Fiddling while Rome burns

OK, OK. So it wasn’t a fiddle that Nero played while the city of Rome went up in flames. It may have been a lyre, or a kithara, but definitely not a fiddle. The violin had yet to be invented. 

Nero was reportedly in nearby Antium when the fire broke out. He rushed to Rome and opened his gardens and buildings to the weary and frightened citizens as they fled the fires that engulfed their homes. He then mounted his private stage in full costume and sang in its entirety “The Destruction of Troy,” while the city went up in smoke. A royal performance from a man who fancied himself quite the artist and entertainer, and even took a year off from ruling to tour the known world.

Now, you Nero scholars out there, don’t get your undies in a twist. Many of these stories, it is true, have been debunked as malicious propaganda. However, true or false, they are rife with metaphorical possibilities. And besides, there is plenty that is known about this man to make you flip your toupee or raise the hairs of your surgical implants. I mean, for God’s sake, his mother schemed to make him Claudius’ heir in place of the emperor’s own son. However, when she got in the way of Nero’s plans, he did not hesitate to murder her. And Nero went through three wives—murdering the first two—by the time he committed suicide at the age of 30.

Again, let me say, I am no scholar of ancient Roman history. I merely repeat what I have read. And how important are facts, really, when you get right down to it. One might say that what I’ve written above carries the validity of alternative facts. Right?

All of which brings me to the most recent occupant of the White House. Who is currently engaged in creating his own twisted myths, performing them day and night for the entertainment of people who foolishly imagine that he cares about them. Well, he said he loved them, didn’t he? The television celebrity whose dubious star-turn on “The Apprentice” was manipulated into not one, but two successful campaigns for the presidency. The charlatan whose near-assassination did nothing to shake the rabid faith of MAGA, but instead elevated him to the status of savior of the world. Or at least of America.

Stung by accusations that he had set the fire himself for his own amusement, Nero targeted a new religious sect, the Christians, blaming them for the raging fires in 64 A.D. He tortured a few of them into pointing the finger at others, implicating the entire Christian population, who then became fair game for retribution and died horrific deaths for the amusement of Roman citizens. Some Romans were reportedly sympathetic to the plight of the Christians, but finally decided that they must have deserved to die. 

Sound familiar? It should. Adolf Hitler did the same thing to the Jewish population of first Germany, and then as much of Europe as he could get his hands on. Now it is the Muslims—actually, immigrants of whatever religion—who are being demonized, as well as being accused of alien dietary habits. They’re eating the cats, they’re eating the dogs….

Both Nero and Hitler committed suicide rather than face the consequences of their cruelty. And those are facts, nothing alternative about them. Neither of those hypermasculine dictators were bold enough to face accountability and punishment. Nero ordered his slave to guide his hands as he plunged the dagger into his chest. Hitler put a bullet through his own head, leaving his faithful henchmen to face trial and execution, some of them stammering that they had simply been obeying orders.

By the way, the Nazis loved musical entertainment, didn’t they? They herded the inmates of camps like Auschwitz into orchestras and ordered them to perform while other prisoners were being marched out for forced labor. Or while fellow inmates were subjected to the torturous medical experiments of Dr. Josef Mengele and others. Nero might have approved. His last words, as he lay dying, were a lament for his truncated musical talent, “What an artist dies in me!”

As fires rage in California, devouring forests and homes, the occupant in the White House insists that all aid should be conditional, dependent on political fealty, or something to that effect. His henchmen in the House are eager to implement the will of their leader

I wonder. How do you suppose this story will end? 

Does he play the fiddle?